Comments on: Bad Advice Wed: Accept Your Small Self; Strive to be Larger

By: Bill

Bill — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 01:44:22 +0000

I like the distinction, Monica. And there’s another type, too, the wish to destroy. You know that Van Morrison song from Hymns to the Silence? “Professional Jealousy”? It’s better sung, of course, and not meant as a poem:

Professional jealousy can bring down a nation
And personal invasion can ruin a man
Not even his family will understand what’s happening
The price that he’s paying or even the pain

Professional jealousy started a rumor
And then it extended to be more abuse
What started out as just black propaganda
Was one day seen to be believed as truth

They say the truth is stranger than fiction
But a lie is more deadly than sin
It can make a man very bitter and angry
When he thinks that there’s someone, is going to win

Professional jealousy makes other people crazy
When they think you’ve got something that they don’t have
What they don’t understand is it’s just not easy
To cover it all and stand where you stand

Professional jealousy makes no exception
It can happen to anyone at any time
The only requirement is knowing what’s needed
And then delivering what’s needed on time

The only requirement is to know what is needed
In doing the best you know how, deliver on time
The only requirement is to know what is needed
Be best at delivering the product on time

By: john lane

john lane — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 23:12:41 +0000

Great piece. Gutsy and honest. Thank you Dave.

By: LUANNE

LUANNE — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 16:49:33 +0000

Love the honesty! Everything most of us aren’t willing to admit to, and there it is. I suck, I’m awesome, I will never amount to a hill of beans, and nobody but nobody is lucky enough to be me. All in one. Thanks for laying the groundwork that will make me regret, tomorrow, to admitting all this.

By: Hope

Hope — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 07:31:53 +0000

Oh, thank you for saying this. So, so much. You couldn’t have timed it better, David. I just spent an evening beating myself up because I’m not someone else–a rather sweet, younger person I met who happens have a home & to be in much better financial shape than I for family reasons, or possibly a gainfully-employed librarian with health insurance–I was having total ‘class envy’! It makes me feel less petty and small when you confess similar dark nights of the soul.

By: Bill

Bill — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 04:08:48 +0000

I’m jealous of this post. I did share it on FB and getting some nice comments there. Damn you Dave!

By: monica wood

monica wood — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 19:04:51 +0000

We can’t help how we feel–and we’ve all felt some version of what you so poignantly describe. But we sure can help what we do. The first thing I do when that yucky feeling comes a-callin’ is to reach out to the person I’m feeling it toward. Send the card, make the call, do the happy dance–and then that OTHER feeling you describe kicks in.

I make a distinction between jealousy and envy: the former is wanting what another person has; the latter is wishing to TAKE AWAY what that person has so you can have it for yourself. Most of us feel the former, not the latter, in these cases, and it’s important to make the distinction. Jealousy is just the normal human sigh of yearning, but that other thing is petty, eat-you-from within, Seven Deadly Sins envy.

Thanks for this, Dave. Took some major guts.

By: Chelle G

Chelle G — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 15:12:13 +0000

Dave, as a woman who came to herself late in the game, while watching others I know and admire shoot past me, I know this feeling and admire your honesty. There will always be a small part of me that envies those youngsters who knew they could do it early on, but envy accomplishes nothing. I struggle daily to move past that emotion and put drive on the front burner. Your piece shows me that I am not alone. Thank you.

By: Dave

Dave — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 11:01:33 +0000

Thank you. I was reluctant to post it and it was one of the few I didn’t “advertise” on Facebook. So your comment makes me feel better.

By: Dave

Dave — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 10:59:46 +0000

Funny, I was doing some Zen reading on the Cape this week and I’ve been thinking about it and how it relates to my “shack afternoons.” But while the same books infatuated me when I was young, they frustrate me now. I just find my self definition in activity–writing, walking, talking, teaching, biking, drawing, being a dad and husband, etc…–and I have no desire to throw off the shackles of the world. Well, after this book tour, maybe a little desire….

By: Dave

Dave — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 10:56:36 +0000

Not my booktour, but my Thanksgiving plans…..I’d like to get to Wash but it’s been kind of crazy.